Weekend Woes

Well it seems that “getting back on the horse” is not as easy as I’d hoped it would be. I woke up early on Saturday morning for weigh-in and had a slight head-ache. Instead of shaking it off and getting dressed for my meeting, I chose to go back to bed and skip it. I knew I had gained weight on vacation and that I was not back to where I was before it. I allowed this reality to weigh me down (no pun intended) and it set my weekend off on the wrong foot. I completely disregarded tracking my food for the weekend and found myself eating way more than I should have. I went out to eat and even to Cold Stone afterward. It was as if the old me was creeping back in. I even said (out loud), “if I’m going to blow it – I might as well blow it big!” So that is what I did. I of course felt like crap about it later but I chose to let go of the weekend and start fresh this morning. I am well within my points and my body seems to be thanking me for reverting back to healthier choices. The weight on my shoulders seems a little lighter and I feel like I have more energy.

As of yesterday, I decided to start and end my day with devotion. I have a book that is based on the Left Behind series. A series of books that I read a few years ago and that really changed my life. It has been very good for my soul and has reminded me that my faith will never fail me – as long as I don’t fail it. There is a song on KTIS and the first verse is:

Everybody falls sometimes
Gotta find the strength to rise
From the ashes and make a new beginning
Anyone can feel the ache
You think it’s more than you can take
But you're stronger, stronger than you know
Don’t you give up now
The sun will soon be shining
You gotta face the clouds
To find the silver lining

This song seems to come on my radio every time I need to hear it, including this weekend. It was the song that I “adopted” as my anthem after being laid off from my job over a year ago. Every time I listen to it, I realize that it really applies to my life in general. And it is the inspiration that has allowed me to let go of my past hurts and failures and move on. Today I forgive myself for losing my way this past weekend and I accept my mistake and will move forward and strive to do better. It is all I can do because dwelling on my mistakes will only drag me down and enable me to give up.

So onward and upward I go. I will attend my meeting on Saturday come hell or high water. I will weigh in whether the scale shows a loss or a gain. I will accept accountability for every part of my journey and I will use my failures and mistakes to rise from the ashes and become stronger than I knew.

My mom’s 70^th birthday party is on Saturday which will prove to be a challenge with all of the good food I know will be there. I will allow myself to eat some of it but I will carefully track every morsel that goes into my mouth so I know exactly where I stand at the end of the day. I am excited to celebrate my mom and have family and friends together in her honor.

As far as school, I was surprised to realize I will be graduating with my bachelor’s degree in 3 ½ weeks!! I cannot believe everything happened so quickly. I am excited and scared all at the same time. I am ready to be done with school but it also means that I will need to work harder than ever to find a job and re-enter the “working world”! I have had a hard time finding any HR jobs in my area but of course there seems to be an over abundance of accounting jobs. So I may find myself back in accounting depending how the job market goes. I like accounting and I am good at it, I just hoped to find a position that allowed me to interact more with people (which is why my degree emphasizes human resources). I will leave it in God’s hands and believe that the right position will find me and that it will be exactly what I need!

Well, I’d better get back to my Monday and at least look at my school work for the week.

Have a Healthy Day!

~Heidi